Cut!
by Luna Corrona
Summary: SPOIILERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OoP the Movie. The bloopers. The key words phrases are "Damnit, Sirius!" and "Cut!"
1. Power Rangers!

"Alright, action!" Luna Grace Corrona yelled. The scene on the set was  
quiet, and it was a very somber scene. This was the scene where Lupin  
prevented Harry from pursuing his godfather behind the veil, where our hot  
hero had met his unfortunate demise.  
"Harry, there is nothing you can do! Sirius is dead! Do you here  
me? Harry? Do you here that?" Remus had been restraining Harry, but a  
powerful drumbeat had come into the background. Only the children who were  
Muggleborn understood what was going.  
"Oh, dear Lord. Not this again," Hermione was saying, having  
regained full consciousness at this song."  
"Why," asked Ginny, "what's going-"  
"Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers!" yelled Sirius Black, running out  
from behind the veil. Harry was beating his head on the floor, and Luna  
held her head in her hands.  
"Damnit, Sirius! CUT! 


	2. I Want Your George Michael

"Okay, quiet on the set! Bernie, do we have the music cued?"  
"Yeah, Miz Corrona. Cued!"  
"Great! Actors in place? Arthur, can you breathe?"  
"Yes, Luna! Thanks for loosening the bandaids!"  
"Sure thing! Okay! Action!" This was the scene where the Weasley  
family was finally being reunited with their father, and Luna had arranged  
for some music to be playing in the background. The Weasley clan gathered  
around Arthur, and Luna gave Bernie the signal. He hit the play button on  
the music, but something was amiss, because instead of the background music  
from General Hospital, loud George Michael music was coming out of the  
speakers!  
"Sex is natural, sex is good! Not everybody does it, but everybody  
should!" Molly looked horrified, Ginny looked disturbed, Remus was sending  
Luna looks that she returned with disgust, Ron looked in awe, Harry and  
Hermione smacked their foreheads, and the twins and Mister Weasley were  
fighting back laughter.  
"CUT!! SIRIUS ORION BLACK!" Luna yelled. From somewhere off the  
set, Luna heard high-pitched screaming.  
"Sirius Black, your ass is mine. How DARE you sabotage Luna's music,  
ESPECIALLY in this scene! You WILL PAY," the distinct voice of Sally Anne  
MacDarwin was heard, followed by a motorcycle revving, and the sounds of  
Sirius Black running in circles around the set on foot as his girlfriend  
chased him.  
"Sally, no! AHHHHHHH, Remus, HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
"OH," groaned Luna, "quiet on the set." They heard a loud crash,  
then high-pitched feminine squealing.  
"You are going to be singing soprano, Sirius Orion Black!" The men  
all winced, and Luna fought back laughter.  
"Remus, darling, you'd better go help out Sirius." 


	3. Bye Bye, Bernie

"Alright, I am determined to get at least one ruddy scene shot today.  
Understand?"  
"Yes, Miss Corrona."  
"Soon to be Lupin," Remus added under his breath.  
"Stop!" Luna cried. "Who said that?" The cast members looked at  
each other, and Sirius raised his hand.  
"It was not," said Luna, getting off the chair and passing Sirius to  
kiss her fiancée.  
"Okay, quiet on the set." Someone was humming something, and it  
didn't stop there.  
"If ya want my body, and ya think I'm sexy-"  
"SIRIUS!!!" the entire cast yelled. He looked at his feet and  
blushed. Sally gave him a kiss on the cheek, and he perked right up.  
"Right," Bernie, one of the stagehands said, "The scene where those  
freaky kids get into the Department of Ministries and wonder what the f-"  
"BERNIE! I CAN STILL DOCK YOUR PAY!" Bernie stopped for a moment,  
and looked at his boss, whom he'd been eager to strike out at since the  
filming had begun.  
"Not according the Union, you can't, Miz Corrona. I'll call my  
lawyer, and-"  
"Bernie, I am your lawyer! I represent the Union!!"  
"Mind if I do this," a voice said from behind her.  
"M'Shenda!" Luna hugged her best friend.  
"You didn't think I was going to let you direct this yourself did  
you?" Luna smiled.  
"The veil scene, take one. Bernie, you're fired. Action!"  
"Excellent," said M'Shenda. They turned their attention to the set,  
where Luna Lovegood was delivering a line. Luna Corrona and M'Shenda  
shared dark looks.  
"You know," said Luna darkly, "my author created me before anyone  
even knew when the 5th book was coming out."  
"Quite right," said M'Shenda.  
"What is behind the veil," asked Ginny. They paused for a moment,  
because a woman scantily clad in a sort of bunny outfit walked behind the  
veil with a tray containing drinks.  
"Alright," they heard Severus Snape's voice coming, "one-eyed jacks  
and kings are wild." Anyone want to lay a bet?" Luna and Sally exchanged  
raised eyebrows. Luna gave the time out signal to M'Shenda, who had taken  
over the filming for the day. She instructed the cast to be silent, as she  
crept to the veil, and listened outside of it. On the count of three, Luna  
ripped the veil aside, to see most of the male cast and production crew  
playing cards, drinking beer, and some of them smoking cigars, as what  
appeared to be Playboy bunnies were serving them more drinks.  
"REMUS JOSHUA LUPIN! IS THIS YOUR IDEA OF A PRE-NUPTUAL  
AGREEMENT?!?!" Remus dropped the cards, and Sirius Black started laughing,  
until Sally came running over and hit him.  
"YOU"RE SLEEPING ON THE SOFA TONIGHT!"  
"CUT!" screamed Luna and M'Shenda at the same time. 


End file.
